Welcome to the Men's Day 2010 Season

There is no such thing as a free lunch or drink

Oct 6, 2010 | Posted by Shankless

 

Reader advisory Warning:   Actually, this week there is none...it's the last blog for awhile....so if I offend you...get over it.

 

 

Ingersoll G&CC Wed Sept 29th, 2010 --- WE HAVE A GOLF PUTTING CHAMPION!!

 

The practice green @ IG&CC was the place to be Wednesday evening as 60 Wednesday Men's Day participants took their shot (or putt) at $750.   The contest was quickly lowered to 7 then 4 then 2 contestants.   After many rounds of head to head putting Member Gord Pike edged Ken Albridge with a 6 foot putt to win $750!!!!!!

 

Immediately upon the victory, most of the 60 participants headed into the clubhouse in anticipation of a victory drink assumely courtesy of the 2010 Putting Champion.    Five minutes went by.........no drink.   Ten minutes went by...no drink   Fifteen minutes went by...no drink.  I starting getting the shakes so I ordered a draft....it was freaking out the people at my table.

 

A Search committee was formed and a posse went looking for the elusive Putting Champion....but to no avail---the champ was gone.

 

Rumblings started throughout the clubhouse.  Hacker Hayes, IG&CC's Most Useless Bastard of the Year yelled out.....".We've been Piked.   I certainly am no mother***ing piker.   I'll be myself a drink."  

 

So I says to myself  "Piked"?  What does he mean by that -- well according to Webster Dictionary the definition of Pike is

 

pike

–verb (used without object), piked, pik·ing. Older Slang .
to go, leave, or move along quickly.

 

Hmmmm......for those who were dissappointed not to get a drink relax.......Our champion lived up to the name.

 

On a serious note......congratulations and clutch putting Mr. Pike.  I really could have used the money....but then again..you have to be able to putt to win.

 

 

Kudos..............................

 

  • Steve Bryant, Our pro, for putting fun back into Wednesday night Men's league.   There was certainly more accolades than complaints this year as it pertained to the league.  Steve has been very creative in trying to instill greater participation  within the club this year and deserves an applause. 
  • Steve also stole the show (while we were all waiting for a drink -- I am not bitter) with some gag awards-----hard to beleive but 11 time Club Champion Hacker Hayes score was only counted for his team 3 times all summer.  
  • Men's Playing Committee (Or whatever you call yourselves)---great work with the Labatt Sponsorship.....no gonna mention any names but I thought Jason Spense was going to cry when he saw Labatt 50 on tap.   Also the concept for the putting contest was a great idea.  Getting 60 golfers per week carding scores --- a great idea.
  • The members who took part on Wednesdays --- a big thank you for coming out.   Club's are only as successful as the members want it to be.  It was a great sight last Wednesday seeing sixty guys standing on the putting green hamming it up and having a good time.

 

Parting Shots..................Captain's first

  • Dave Wilson -  The look of fear on his face when he found out Jason Spense bought a round of Drinks for his team.....I have never seen a guy panic like that.  The ultimate was him calling his wife Sandy for permission.....it went like this "Sandy.....er...is it ok if I by my team a drink..another Captain did it for his team and now everyone is being mean to me"   Sandy's reply was "Only if you make your team wear "Farmer's Feed Cities" buttons (SHE WAS JOKING)....but the buttons did look good on everyone.
  • Brodie Nadeau -- led all Captain's in DNFs.   Next year we are not going to call it DNF.......If you fail to finish a hole you will be deemed to have "Brodied it"
  • Barry Taylor ---- Captain of the appropriately named Trash Talkers.   One Win.   Thats Like a mouse making love to an elephant saying "brace yourself".   Next year...Celler Dweller would be more appropriate...or Maple Leafs.
  • Bill Hayes --- called himself the Scotty Bowman of golf team Captains.   Actually got that wrong...he is "the same c*cks**king mother f*****g genius as that short balding pr*ick that won so many Cups with Detroit and Montreal.   Don't have to be any good..just select the right group of idiots and the rest will take care of itself. 
  • Jason Spence......I've got nothing....I just wanna be like him
  • Mike Tucker.....great guy.  Just don't ask his wife.

 

Parting Shots ------- The Pro

 

  • nothing really -- he is good for our egos.  A show of hands.....how many had the pleasure of taking down the pro this year.   I have seem him bowl ----- I think he has found his game.

 

 

HAVE A GREAT OFFSEASON.....FOR THOSE OF YOU TAKING PART IN THE CLOSING STAG....SEE YOU ON THE 16TH.

 

 

SHANKLESS TUCKER


Posted by: The Pro | Oct 6, 2010 01:34 PM


Great blog Tucker! I'm glad I can conrtibute to inflating my member's egos...just part of being a club professional. Great year gentlemen. Looking forward to next season!!!

2010 The Year of the Hawks

Sep 28, 2010 | Posted by Shankless

(Reader Advisory Warning........the author is going to paraphrase/quote Bill "Hacker" Hayes.......need I say more)

 

WEEK #17  Highlights

  • Nobody won the putting contest.   The $750 pot will be won this Wed. night.   So c'mon out and hopefully get a crack at the pot.
  • Read below.......Wilson's cowpatties lost AGAIN.....giving up first place.
  • Nobody beat the Pro.....Wow......Donkey's do fly backwards (just kidding Steve)

 

This is a great year for teams with the name "Hawks".   First it was the young team in Chicago winning a Stanley Cup for the first time in 40 years and then Hacks Hawks pulled off the unthinkable and took out Wilson CowPatties 188-197 to take first place by  7 points 306 to 299.  Hack's team also lead the league in participation points.....with 181......it was the determining factor in the final standings as Wilson's Cowpatties had more wins than the first place Hawks

Final Standings:

Standings for Men's Day 2010

Position Team Win Loss Tie Part/Week Part/Year Total
1 Hacks Hawks 12 4 1 10 181 306
2 Wilsons Cow Patties 13 4 0 9 169 299
3 Shankless Tuckers 8 6 3 8 176 271
4 Back Breakers 5 10 2 7 144 204
5 Foot Wedgers 5 9 3 6 136 201
6 Trash Talkers 1 11 5 6 144

179

 

 

Hacker's team was lead by Luke Ramsey with a gross 39.   Ron Grundy, Wayne House and Dale Coghlin counted for net 37's with Joe Hawkins rounding out the scoring with a gross 38.   Once again, Hacker Hayes was a "useless bastard" (to which his wife Elva says........"ahhhhh yaaa") carding a 45.

 

For Wilson Cowpatties -- Pat Ring was once again the team leader with a respectable 41.......rounding out the scoring was Dave Wilson (surprise!!!!! his score counted) a net 36 and Stewart Woods, Rob Lemmons and Brian Woods carding net 40's.

 

Wilson took the loss particularly hard.   When asked to express his feelings he had this to say "I can't believe we lost.   Look at this league.....everyone is horrible.   We lead the league in wins and don't finish in first.....who makes up these rules?!?  (Indirect shot at the pro).  I am not going to point any fingers.....but if you wanna know who's fault this is...talk to my teammates.....

Top 10 Reasons (according to Dave Wilson) why they lost.......

 

1.  "My ovaries are killing me these days"

2.  I went celebate in preparation for the big day but I couldn't find the party. (Ah...Dave---that should read "celebRate")

3. Frank Donavon is horrible.

4. Hacker said mean things to me before the round.

5. Brian Travis wore normal clothes.

6. Purposely lost as I wasn't allowed to buy a round if we had won.

7.  Frank Donavon is horrible.

8.  Pat Ring failed to shoot par.

9.  My Putter failed me.

10.  I was gripping my shaft too hard.....(insert your own punchline here)

 

Top 10 Reasons (according to Hacker Hayes) why they won

1.  "We took fewer strokes then they did you f**king idiot!

2.  "We didn't have to count my syphillitic c***s***ing f**king score!

3.  "My team shows up......the Cow Patties blew their wad in the participation column.   Hey Dave--- pretty simple...show up and get a point.......duh.........".

4. I only had 3 beer during the round.

5.  I went celebate in the month leading up to the big day (editor note:  this wasn't voluntary)

6.  We didn't need to count Flubb's score.

7. If it looks like a "choke" and acts like a "choke" --- then it probably is a "choke".........(Hacker then goes into a coughing jag).

8.  We are obviously better than those f*ck*ng clowns.

9. We chose the right team name----pride took over.  Just what this club needed a potential champion with the name Cowshit......couldn't let it happen.

10.  I refuse to lose to any guy who wears a pink shirt.

 

See everyone on Wednesday..........One more blog to go.....Good luck with the putting contest!!!!!!!!

 

Shankless


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Bring out the Cliches

Sep 20, 2010 | Posted by Shankless

 

(Reader Advisory:   Given that this is the last blog of the WEDNESDAY NIGHT MEN'S LEAGUE....the writer strongly caution's any non-participant from reading any further.   The contents of this section contains inferred language that may offend some.   Any reference to actual occurrences is purely coincidental and will not stand up in a court of law.  Relax....read...enjoy)

 

AND THEN THERE WERE TWO...........THE COW PATTIES MAY ACTUALLY SLIP TO SECOND PLACE WITH A LOSS TO HACKS HAWKS.  HERE ARE THE STANDINGS............

 

Standings for Men's Day 2010

 

Position Team Win Loss Tie Part/Week Part/Year Total
1 Wilsons Cow Patties 13 3 0 7 160 290
2 Hacks Hawks 11 4 1 12 171 286
3 Shankless Tuckers 8 6 2 10 168 258
4 Back Breakers 5 9 2 9 137 197
5 Foot Wedgers 4 9 3 7 130 185
6 Trash Talkers 1 11 4 8 138 168


So let the prognostications begin..........

 

 

........It all comes down to this.......

.......There is no tomorrow...........

........Loser goes home................

Will the Cow Patties actually choke a season long lead? Are they the Capitals or Penguins or Bruins of the Wed. Night Mens League?   Can Hack recover from Tuesday Night Bowling to get enough rest to be able to grip a club and see the fairway?   Will Wilson's Team members show up (only 7 participants to Hack's 12 last week)?   Stay tuned.

OK Folks......after having to endure the Cow Patties coast to coast lead in the standings..a funny thing happened last Wednesday.......THE SHANKLESS TUCKER'S BEAT THEM.  To paraphrase Dave....."This is how I did it......I am really good you know....." 

In response to my taunting.....Dave Wilson Quipped --- "Big Talk Tucker....nobody is going to remember who finished in 3rd" .  My only reply was....."But they will remember you losing after leading all year".....then he cried........

 

Before we go any further.......let's get some commentary from both captains.  (Editor again strongly cautions against reading any further as 11 time club champion Hacker Hayes WILL be quoted).

Question #1:   OK Gentlemen.  How are you going to individually prepare for Wednesday?

Wilson:   First of all Tuck, I wanna thank you for not asking how I did at the Oxford-Amateur this weekend as I need to focus on the positives (editor note:  Dave shot 92 and 97 on the weekend.....and as Forest Gump said "that's all I got to say 'bout that).....that being said Dave boldly stated....."I am going celibate until after the match on Wednesday".  I have nothing to add other than Mrs. Wilson must be the happiest woman in the world.

Hacker Hayes: Tucker...I have been playing this f*****g game for fifty f******g years.  I can play this course through the back of my "F*****g eyelids....which may have to happen as I am bowling on Tuesday night and I tee off at noon on Wednesday."

Question #2:  Who is going to win?

Wilson:  "Who do you think stupid?  Of course we are going win...just look at my roster of players .......I got low scoring Pat Ring......I got newcomer Stewie Wood and a bunch of other guys....I just can't remember there names right now.....but they''ll be there" (Editor note......I think a round of drinks will be coming there way should they hold off the hawks...all in favour say "I").

Hacker Hayers:  "The team that shoots the lowest team score you "f*****g tool.   It is hard to believe we have a shot.  But leave it to Super Dave.  My guys have played steady all year and they won't let me down.  I know I can be a useless Bastard and the rest of the guys will still come through.  And don't even F*****g think of mentioning to the rest of the team that I will buy drinks if we win........."  (Just quoting....didn't mention a thing......)

 

Question #3:    If you win......how are you going to celebrate?

 

 Wilson:   Crabbie Joes

Hacker Hayers:   Crabbies

 

 GOOD LUCK TO BOTH TEAM ON WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON!!!!!! REMEMBER TO LOGIN TO www.golfscoring.net/ingersoll for up to date scoring.....

GOLF JOKE OF THE WEEK

 

Off the seventh tee, Joe sliced his shot deep into a wooded ravine. He took his eight iron and clambered down the embankment in search of his lost ball.

After many long minutes of hacking at the underbrush, he spotted something glistening in the leaves. As he drew nearer, he discovered that it was an eight iron in hands of a skeleton!
Joe immediately called out to his friend, "Jack, I've got trouble down here!"
"What's the matter?" Jack asked from the edge of the ravine.
"Bring me my wedge," Joe shouted. "You can't get out of here with an eight iron!"
 
 
HAVE FUN OUT THERE....
 
Tucker

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A New CC and A Former CC Impresses on Wed

Sep 13, 2010 | Posted by Shanless Tucker

 

Here we are in the middle of September.......our season is now down to a few weeks to go before we all embrace our winter time activities.   I don't know about you-----but every activity I seem to partake in is that much more enjoyable as beer is readily accessible.  Some would say I have a drinking problem.......they are wrong....I never spill the stuff.

 

 

 

OK.......first the Club C

 

Congratulations to our new Club Champion Mr. Brodie Nadeau...captain of the Back Breakers.  Brody shot 77, 78 and 82 on his way to keeping 2 shots clear of the field.   So here is your fearless bloggers 5 Questions to our new champion:

 

1.  Congratulations Brodie --- do you realize that unnofficially, I think this was the highest winning score in the history of the club (+21)?

 

Answer:  Great.....first you compliment me then kick.  Make up your mind Shankless.  I shot the lowest score of the field.   How did you do....hmmmm?  (editor note:  I didn't answer....too embarassed)

 

2.  Your close friend, Luke Ramsey was openly cheering against you....care to comment?

Answer:  Luke gave me a ride to the course.  He said.."If you win......you are walking home".    God, it is good to have close friends.  He thinks I want to rub the win in his face.....that is just immature.   Luke, if you can read---and you are reading this....hahahahahahahahahah.....I have my own car!!"

3.  What was the club you chose to drive with on 18?

Answer:   Rescue club

4. How did you make out with that choice?

Answer:  I needed to be rescued from the decision.  A little scrambly after that call.

 

5.  Most winners, after winning an important championship announce they are going to Disneyland?  What are your travel plans?

 

Answer:  That's simple --- Crabby Joe's  (A big thank you to Luke Ramsey on this one folks)

And Now for a Former Club C

 

The Foot Wedgers massacred the field last Wednesday  absolutely pounding the backbreakers 178-200.  Captain Jason Spence after carding a 1 Over 38 (folks this is after teeing off at 6:35 pm....playing 8 and 9 in virtual darkness had the following comments to say:

 

  • "Tucker.....you better write about this in the blog"
  • Even the new club champion Nadeau "Wishes he was Jason Spense"
  • "I'm going to Crabbies"

 

Team Scoreboard

 

Team Score   Team Score
Foot Wedgers 178 vs Back Breakers 200
Hacks Hawks 193 vs Shankless Tuckers 196
Wilsons Cow Patties 201 vs Trash Talkers 204

 

In other action......Hacks Hawks remained in 2nd place edging out my team 193-196.  I had my first DNF of the year.....I quit before I got to the first tee....yellow blocks........ok...it was the white blocks.  Now for the up to date standings.  I am done writing about the Wilson Cowpatties.  It just hurts...so much.  Go  Hack Go.  Go Hack Go. Have fun out there.S

andings for Men's Day 2010

Position Team Win Loss Tie Part/Week Part/Year Total
1 Wilsons Cow Patties 13 2 0 10 153 283
2 Hacks Hawks 10 4 1 12 159 264
3 Shankless Tuckers 7 6 2 9 158 238
T4 Foot Wedgers 4 8 3 8 123 178
T4 Back Breakers 4 9 2 9 128 178
6 Trash Talkers 1 10 4 8 130

160

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 


Posted by: Captain Foot Wedge | Sep 13, 2010 11:04 AM


Ohhh that's nice Tuck..... try and take me down with you! Brodie.....let's just same the editor of this blog has abused his creative license! That being said.....we did kick your ass! Not sure but probably the largest margin of VICTORY of the season! Who's next?

Posted by: The Pro | Sep 15, 2010 11:05 AM


Great Blog Tuck!!

Posted by: Captain Back Breaker | Sep 16, 2010 01:51 PM


Great job on the blog Tuck! What's the saying? Those who can, do, those who can't, blog about it? Spence - as captain, when your first overall pick (and club head professional no less) gets beat by half the field you consider yourself lucky to lose by only 22 points. Steve Bryant.....The Alexandre Daigle of Ingersoll men's league!

Posted by: The Pro | Sep 18, 2010 06:20 PM


Wow...that's harsh. This coming from the Man who holds the highest Club C victory total in Ingersoll history...and one who shot 8 over par this wednesday to follow up his impressive win!! I thought we were on the same team here....

Well That Was a Nice Break

Aug 28, 2010 | Posted by Shankless Tucker

View entry

Men's League Update

Aug 14, 2010 | Posted by The Pro

View entry

Welcome to August

Aug 4, 2010 | Posted by Shankless Tucker

View entry

Week 8 Update/Week #9 Preview

Jul 28, 2010 | Posted by The Shankless Tucker

View entry

Week #7 Update---League Tightens Up

Jul 18, 2010 | Posted by Tucker----

View entry

Game on Pro.....Game On

Jul 12, 2010 | Posted by Can't Get into my Kitchen....Tucker

View entry

Week #6 Update

Jul 12, 2010 | Posted by Tucker - Winless in Match Play

View entry

Week #4 Results

Jun 28, 2010 | Posted by Tucker --- Obviously Split Personality Issues

View entry

Week #3 Men's Day Update

Jun 18, 2010 | Posted by Tucker --- THE MOST USELESS BASTARD

View entry

Week #2 Men's Day Summary

Jun 12, 2010 | Posted by Mike Tucker

View entry

2010 Men's League Rules

May 28, 2010 | Posted by Steve Bryant

View entry

2010 Men's Day

May 4, 2010 | Posted by Men's Day Committee

View entry
Men's Day Sponsors:

Sponsor

Andy's Auto

Don Robinson wins the the Labatt draw for September!!

Prize: Adidas Sweater

Congrats Don!

 

Weekly Numbers

June 2 - 52 Players

June 9 - 54 Players

June 16 - 57 Players

June 23 - 58 Players

June 30 - 62 Players

July 7 - 58 Players

July 14 - 58 Players

July 21 - 54 Players

July 28 - 51 Players

Aug 4 - 59 Players

Aug 11 - 50 Players

Aug 18 - 61 Players

Aug 25 - 58 Players

Sept 1 - 61 Players

Sept 8 - 56 Players

Sept 15 - 54 Players

Sept 22 - 46 Players




Money List
Pos. Name Winnings
T1 Moe Rogers $119
T1 Joe Hawkins $119
T1 Bill Jordan $119
4 Bill Fuller $109
5 Bill Hayes $107
6 Joe Ryan $105
7 Wayne House $104
8 Ian Gibson $90
T9 Doug Campbell $89.5
T9 Al Seymour $89.5
T9 Don Robinson $89.5
T9 Mike Tucker $89.5
T9 Craig Robinson $89.5
T9 Don Lemp $89.5
T9 Steve Phillips $89.5
T9 Craig Davidson $89.5
T17 Brian Woods $88
T17 Dave Wilson $88
T17 Stewart Wood $88
T17 Brian Travis $88
21 Paul Henderson $83
T22 Dale Coghlin $81
T22 Don Wall $81
24 Len Martin $80
25 Brad Knott $78
26 Ron Grundy $77
27 Bill Legg $76
28 Tom Moran $70.5
29 Luke Ramsay $69
30 Frank Donovan $67
T31 Pat Ring $66
T31 Rob Lemmons $66
33 Bob Fuller $56
T34 Doug Plume $55
T34 Fred Brown $55
36 Doug Peacock $54
37 Ed Thompson $51.5
T38 Dick Willsie $48.5
T38 Brodie Nadeau $48.5
T38 Ken Albright $48.5
T38 Steve Baskette $48.5
T38 Ralph Harris $48.5
43 Ian Sclater $42
44 Jason Spence $34
T45 Ron Valotaire $33.5
T45 Vic Sousa $33.5
47 Jim Gordon $30
T48 Andrew Lebell $27
T48 George Fitzpatrick $27
T48 Barry Taylor $27
T48 Mike MacDonald $27
T48 Bill Stratton $27
T48 Steve Gerofsky $27
T48 Mark Warnick $27
T55 Phil Chaput $24
T55 Scott Walker $24
T55 Geoff Scott $24
T55 John Loebach $24
T55 Bruce Rhynd $24
T55 Scott Sclater $24
61 Rick Travis $20.5
T62 Jerry Lake $20
T62 Mark Clancy $20
T64 Steve Edens $15
T64 William Smith $15
T66 Kevin Pitkin $14
T66 Vince Johns $14
T66 Mark Ellis $14
T66 Carl Humphries $14
T66 Steve Lehouillier $14
71 Gord Pike $13
T72 Bill Burnett $10
T72 Terry Lamb $10
Total Payout $4048

Players on course

Foot Wedgers

Scott Walker