Welcome to the Wednesday Club 2012 Season
May 24, 2012 | Posted by The CommishWHY CAN'T WE PLAY LIKE A TEENAGE BOY - QUICKLY
Is there anything men do slowly? If you were to ask any woman that question she’d definitely answer it with an emphatic NO. The reason being is because quite simply, men are programed for speed. We drive, eat, drink, pee, shower, and
So now to the point I really wanted to make in this BLOG. If men are inherently speed demons by nature, why is it when on the golf course we ditch our V8’s for the garden variety fuel efficient lawn mower engine? If we want to slow it down that much had The play yesterday, especially in the late afternoon was not good. It was slow. How slow was it you ask? The Amish guy driving the horse and buggy was giving us the finger it was that slow
So what can we do about slow play because I’m afraid if this keeps up we’ll just about kill the Wednesday League and that is the last thing I want to happen. So your suggestions, comments, and beefs are welcomed and encouraged. One thing I need to do is convince management to prepare the golf course for more friendly and conversely – speedy - play. They can easily Now to the results from yesterday. All in all it was a good day both weather wise and in scoring. Six of the eight teams were within 3 strokes of one another with the TRAVEL INSURANCE OFFICE TEAM taking top honors at a 246 total. I don’t know what happened to TRIANGLE HVAC or AADCO AUTO PARTS at 259 and 258 respectively; maybe they were too busy fixing air conditioners or cars yesterday to bother playing golf. We did however get 171 guys out which may have had more to do with the weather than anything else, certainly not slow play. In any regard, I thank all those that participated. I’m also glad to see every team has at least one win under their belt. This should make for a very competitive season. However, as in past years, participation is the key. Take a look at the top three teams, NO’s 1, 2, & 3 in total participation. This is the key fellows so get out and participate. I’ll do my bit to help speed up play and hopefully encourage all of you to come out and enjoy the fun in 2 hours and 10 minutes or less. One last comment, I want to thank each of our returning CORPORATE SPONSORS and a special thanks to our new SPONSORS. Please support these companies because their support for the WEDNESDAY LEAGUE deserves acknowledgement from not just me but everyone. Every team now has a corporate sponsor so please refer to your team by the appropriate name. A BIG THANKS TO; 1. ROSETOWN CENTRAL REFRIGERATION (Ben O`Rourke) 2. GRANT THORNTON (Donnie Morris) 3. TEAM 1 – TRADERS CUSTOMS BROKERAGE (Dave De Caire) 4. TEAM 2 – BUTTERBALL CANADA (Mike Barrett) 5. TEAM 3 – SCANNELL MOVING & STORAGE (Steve Scannell) 6. TEAM 4 – TRIANGLE HVAC (Mike Laing) 7. TEAM 5 – SEMPLE GOODER ROOFING (Bill Gray) 8. TEAM 6 – AADCO AUTO PARTS (Gary Marinacci) 9. TEAM 7 – TRAVEL INSURANCE OFFICE (Paul Field) 10. TEAM 8 – ICS COURIER (Bryan Sonnenberg) Till next week, and as always, congratulations to all the winners. P.S. We play the back nine next week as we do every last Wednesday of the month. Hopefully this will speed up play. It also happens to be STEAK & RIB NIGHT so come out and enjoy MAN DAY on the golf course. RESULTS – WEEK 3 May 23, 2012 UNOFFICIAL
Posted by: Sir Sandy Baggers | May 24, 2012 11:19 AMMoving the tees up to the front of the boxes would help a lot. Standard length rough would help.
Posted by: Rudy | May 26, 2012 08:28 AMFrom Wuxi (pronounced WooShee) China,
Hate to say it but GAO impose timing penalties for slow play
Another great blog Mr. Commish and a great analogy.
Don't have my spreadsheet but I think last week was a record high average.
May 17, 2012 | Posted by The CommishDANDY DALTON
I hate dandelions. Not only are they just about the ugliest thing alive next to athletics foot or ball fungus b
Did you know that dandelions are not native to North America? This totally us
But unlike the state of our golf games where we blame everything and anything other than ourselves, I blame the profusion of dandelions on one man – Dalton and his ban on pesticides. Thanks to Dalton the only thing growing in good old Ontario besides our burgeoning debt is dandelions. I mean have you ever in your life seen so many dandelions? Towns all across this province have spent millions building boulevards up the middle of their respective
So w And what gives with the pin placement on 2? What sadistic, man hating SOB puts the pin there? Do any of you guys have an X who cuts holes with an axe to grind? If any of you do, tell her next time she decides to cut the hole in that same location to bring a can of paint with her so she can paint the clown’s nose around it while she’s at it.
I’ve saved the best for last. As some of you know, there is a certain Captain I’ve poked, prodded, ridiculed and humiliated in the past. Seems I love self-abuse. But that aside, I want to talk about another Captain who between this year and last spent a good part of the winter in front of the TV watching infomercials. Yes, the HAIR CLUB FOR MEN has a new client – Peter Towne. No longer is that oversized and oddly shaped cranium covered by one of Bing Crosby’s finest, instead Peter proudly struts around displaying a jungle of filamentous biomaterial otherwise known as – hair. This might explain why Peter had such a difficult time yesterday on the golf course. Seems hair blowing in the wind and getting in the way of his eyesight takes some getting use to. Peter, might I suggest Brylcreem for those windy days.
Till next week ... and as always ... congratulations to all the winners.
RESULTS – WEEK 2 May 16, 2012 OFFICIAL
CAPTAINS HAVE 48 HOURS TO DISPUTE SCORES Posted by: donnie | May 17, 2012 10:32 PMDave great first 2 blogs Peter Peter hair is very over rated; I heard some people actually complaining about no combs in the new locker room. No win is a sweeter win than a win over Peter. I missed commenting last week that the Town team will be like the horses I bet on; great starters and then show their colours down the stretch. The commish has it right with that # 2 pin placement; our group made some long putts to come away happy with a quad of 6s. team 3 is now positioned to make a run as did great positioning in first 2 weeks. until next week keep it straight and long. The Heckler
May 10, 2012 | Posted by The CommishDO YOU HAVE A LONG PUTTER?
How many putters do you own? At last count I think I have around 20, 19 of which are gathering dust in the p
Putters and me share a number – three – as in three putts. That seems to be the only
Speaking of putters, have you ever thought about what clubs get sold the most? That’s easy, putters and drivers.
That’
So with that being said, I met Fraser on the putting green the other day and he showed me a new contraption (not what you are thinking guys) of a putter. This thing was not only a long putter but an adjustable long putter. It OK, I’ll talk about our first Wednesday of 2012 now. The first thing worth mentioning is the weather. It started off as a stellar day but by the time the afternoon rolled in it was wet, damp, and chilly. However, that did not deter 171 guys from showing up. APPLAUSE APPLAUSE. I’ve said this before but it needs repeating, the success of the WEDNESDAY LEAGUE is all about participation and the participants. I now know how FRASER spent his winter – practising. Not only was he low man in the OPENING SHOTGUN but he repeated the same feat again yesterday. Seems buying more than his fair share of beer for the BEAT THE PRO challenge last year convinced him to sharpen up his game this year. Either that or he noticed the size of some of those beer guts wandering around the bar lately. Those things are in constant need of supply.
There were quite a few guys who took take of the PASTA BAR last night. It was truly excellent apart from the slight conflict between open air cooking and fire alarms.
All in all, it looks like we are in for a great season. Thanks to all that participated yesterday and for those that either couldn’t make it or were scared off by the threat of rain, join us next week OK. Hopefully the weather will cooperate for not only the golf but our planned BBQ on the deck where we can all eat charred meat while gabbing about the length of our drivers and putters. Till next week ... and as always ... congratulations to all the winners. PS. STILL LOOKING FOR CORPORATE SPONSORS. I NEED EIGHT (8) IN TOTAL. COST $250. THINK ABOUT IT. ALL THIS EXPOSURE AND FUN FOR A MERE $250. YOU CAN'T BUY A LEAF TICKET FOR THAT AND ALL YOU GET THERE IS BOREDOM, FRUSTRATION, AND $12 BEER IN A PLASTIC CUP.
RESULTS – WEEK 1 May 9, 2012 OFFICIAL
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| 0 Comments May 3, 2012 | Posted by The CommishTEES - WHAT TEES
NEW THIS YEAR For those guys that aren't as long as they used to be we are offering up a compromise. YOU CAN PLAY THE FORWARD TEES IF YOU SO DESIRE.
This I believe is fair and equitable especially for our veteran players Posted by: Rudy | May 4, 2012 10:16 PMHUH? like I've never been long (just ask Sandra) so who gets to play the forward tees and which ones? I must qualify with my swing.
Posted by: The Commish | May 5, 2012 07:16 AMYou are correct and Sandra can attest to this I'm sure, YOU ARE NOT LONG. Anyone can play the forward tees if they so desire. I'm assuming they will be the yellow tees as I have seen some guys do that and I'm fine with that. I'm sure you know this Rudy but for those that don't there is a campaign called TEE IT FORWARD. The purpose of the campaign is to encourage golfers to play the tees more ideally suited to their game based on their average driving distance. See http://www.golfcanada.ca/amateur-competition/amateur-championships/article4482.ece for more information.
Posted by: Rudy | May 5, 2012 06:16 PMWOW. This sounds WONDERFUL.
My Avg drive is almost 200 yards so 5,200 - 5,400 yards is what I should be playing which are the RED tees at TGCC. (5164 yds)
BUT. are you sure the boys at RCGA who wrote that BS really want you to apply it to a fully competitive program like we have on Wednesdays with a slightly different methodology of calculating handicaps. HEY Sir Commish I'm all for it. Certify my avg drive lenghts in some manner and tell me I can play the RED tees on Wednesday.
Then the bombers like you who can hit it 250 plus should be back on the BLUES. Love it but not sure you want to do this.
Posted by: The Commish | May 6, 2012 08:15 PMRudy, the whole idea behind TEE IT FORWARD is to promote the game not hinder it. And I'm all for that. I have no qualms in you playing the RED TEES or the PINK if there was such an animal. Remember, your WEDNESDAY LEAGUE HANDICAP is based on your best 4 out of 7 scores with no ESC so in the end it doesn't matter what TEES you play because it is all relative. And if it keeps guys interested, competitive and makes it more enjoyable, why not play it forward. So you play the TEES you want to play. I think the more guys adapt to the TEE IT FORWARD program the better off we'll all be.
Read Last Seasons Entries |
Wednesday Club Sponsors:
ROSETOWN CENTRAL REFRIGERATION  thanks to Ben O'Rourke GRANT THORNTON  thanks to Donnie Morris TRAVEL INSURANCE OFFICE  thanks to Paul Field TRADERS CUSTOMS BROKERAGE  thanks to Dave De Caire BUTTERBALL CANADA  thanks to Mike Barrett AADCO AUTO PARTS  thanks to Gary Marinacci SCANNELL MOVING & STORAGE  thanks to Steve Scannell ICS COURIER  thanks to Bryan Sonnenberg TRIANGLE HVAC INC.  thanks to Mike Laing SEMPLE GOODER ROOFING  thanks to Bill Gray MENU May 30th STEAK & RIB NIGHT MAN FOOD
50/50 DRAW WINNER May 23 TICKET No. 0356096 DENIS FORTIER & CHES BECK $480.00 WINNER OF A DOZEN GOLF BALLS May 23 MIKE TAYLOR
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shave quickly. In fact, almost everything men do is done hastily. Women know this instinctively. They also hate us for it. And yet the one area where we can best redeem ourselves in the speed department as far as women go, we fail at miserably. Seems our genetics aren’t quite geared into the average woman’s speed monitor. We are already hitting overdrive while she is still shifting from park into drive. Our motors are different too.
Ours is generally equipped with a V-8 engine and a dual-quad cross-ram setup – hers – a 1.1 litre POS from a Lada. There simply is no comparison. Our finishing 
lines, if you catch my drift, are miles apart. But that’s why we are men and they are not. It’s all about speed or the lack thereof.
we not better put it to some complementary use other than on the golf course? I’m sure you’d hear no argument from the women if we did.
do this by cutting the rough with some regularity and positioning the tee blocks and pin placements in spots that promote speed rather than hinder it. Take Hole No. 6 yesterday for example. That was a killer. Why put the blocks in a position that requires nearly 200 yards of carry over a bunker to a tightly placed pin? It doesn’t make sense and management needs to understand this. This is the Wednesday League where we get on average 170 participants every Wednesday along with others. Together, it makes for a busy day. And you will certainly not speed up play or at the very least keep the rounds to an acceptable time by leaving the rough uncut and setting the course up like it was the US Open. So if I can make one suggestion, let’s collectively send this message to management so they clearly understand where we are coming from.
ut they are a nuisance too. My abhorrence to dandelions was further enforced yesterday after discovering a shot I hit to the right on 6 had nestled itself up against – you guessed it – a dandelion. Somehow that yellow 
eless bit of information I discovered the other day. Dandelions are actually native to England which unabashedly puts them into the same category as that other piece of utterly annoying and pointless English importation – CORONATION STREET. 
Main Streets in a vain attempt to beautify our landscape only to have that undertaking along with the money spent be washed away in a sea of dandelions. Even the trilliums are crying foul because they are no longer the official flower of Ontario – the dandelion is. If future historians get it right when they write about us 50 or 100 years from now they should correctly dump the self-affixed label Premier Dad or the Education Premier and replace it with Dandy Dalton.
hat happened yesterday? Well for one thing we had wind – lots of wind. And it wasn’t the kind you associate with the campfire scene in Blazing Saddles either; NO this was the fresh wind variety courtesy of Mother Earth which might help explain the scores from yesterday. Our average gross score was 46.1 and the average net was 40.15. Our resident statistician Rudy will know the answer to this one but I’m willing to bet those are the highest averages to date since inception of the Wednesday League.
One more bitch while I’m at it. What’s with this SLOW PAY crap? I heard from a few guys last night it took the better part of 2½ hours to play the front nine. That quite simply is unacceptable. Sure it was windy and there were a couple of dubious pin placements but that is no excuse. I’ve said this before but it needs repeating, our course should take no longer than 2:10 hours to play per nine and anything longer than that is because you or your group are farting around. I know that statement in and of itself is not politically correct or should I say, Dalton correct, but it is the truth. We’ve all seen and experienced slow play and 9 times out of 10 we all know why so why can’t we just fix it. It’s all in our best
interest to do so.
Oh, one more thing, TEAM 3 beat TEAM 1. Na Na Na Na – Hey Hey Hey – Goodbye. 
shared link between the two of us. I truly wish it were different. I mean there is nothing really wrong with the number three other than when combined with the word PUTT. Think about it, there is the word THREESOME which in the context of the other physical activity that consumes men’s thoughts is perfectly OK. I can dream about three’s all night long in that context. But when it comes to putting, nothing kills the ego and your confidence more than three putting. Three putting is sort of like being invited to join in a threesome with Elton John and Borak, talk about a killer.
Drivers I understand. Drivers are all about length and men are obsessed by length. Ask a guy if he wants to be longer and you have his immediate attention. It’s like stealing candy from a baby for the guys that market golf equipment. All men want to be longer. Which when it comes to advertising drivers I’m surprised those same marketing guys can’t exploit that fact to the maximum. I can see it now on billboards and in TV commercials. GUYS – WANT TO BE LONG – REALLY LONG. Like I said, like stealing candy from a baby.
s why we men are truly stupid. We are such pushovers when it comes to tapping into our innermost psyche. As much as society has evolved, we men creatures still revert to cavemen like instincts when it comes to length. Just like the guy in the bar the other day who bragged about his massive drive on fifteen, I can picture all those cavemen gathering around the fire after the hunt comparing the length of their clubs. Women are all laughing like hell at us because as every woman can tell you from ancient times to the 21st century, honey it’s not how long you are but what you score.
I’m sorry to report that it looks like TEAM No. 1, fronted by that now hairy topped wonder PETER TOWNE, appears to be the team to beat this year. Their 244 total bested the crowd but not by much. TEAM No. 5 headed by new captain, PETER VAN DONGEN, was only 3 strokes behind. And here is another thing to ponder given these two teams early performance, Peter versus Peter. And if memory serves me correctly, that would pit a hairy Peter up against a bald Peter. Now there is a sight that would give any man nightmares.
